5 Weeks

Dear Emily -

I found the battery charger today for the big camera, so hopefully I'll have a few nice pictures of you take tomorrow! These were taken Sunday, just two days ago.

I still find myself often stunned when I look at you, but your absolute beauty is capturing me more and more also. Jennifer says that you are getting more and more beautiful each time she sees you also. Your spirit continues to mature into this incredibly strong and grounded being, it's incredible to watch and feel. You, are incredible.

Yesterday I watched you interact for the first real time with Alyssa. As I held you in my arms with you facing her, she leaned over and took your finger in between her lips softly and lifted up your hand. You seemed to realize it was her that had what you realized as a part of you, and grinned and talked to her. It was amazing to watch. She did this a few times, and each time you responded the same. Jennifer watched you also, and said that she has never seen a 4-week-old interact that way with another person. You really do seem ahead of yourself.

Don't grow too quickly Emily :)

You still aren't put down that much, I enjoy having you in my arms. I enjoy carrying in in the moby carrier, and enjoy feeling you close and safe. One may say to put you down, but really, that time will come all too soon enough when you'll rarely want to be held and will enjoy your independence instead. I'll enjoy this time right now.

Last night you scared me again. You were sleeping over my chest, and I woke up and watched for your back to rise. And waited. And watched. And worried and waited, and finally couldn't wait any longer and rubbed my hand over your back. You threw your hands out and gasped a BIG breath in. I talked with my mom, your grandma, about it and read a bit online. It seems to be normal - your color hadn't changed and I doubt I waited the full 10-20 seconds that they say to wait... I am just grateful that I have you sleeping with me. You still have the cold, which could play a part in things also. I feel more comfortable with the ability to check on you, to see you breathing.

Over your next handful of years you may never see me check you, but I'm sure as you enter kindergarten I'll still be checking your breathing at night. I still do so for Katie, and she's almost 6.

My sweet Emily, you are so amazing. Not a day goes by that I don't tell you so. I still kiss your cheeks and run my hands over your head, ears, arms, feet, and toes. Every part of you is incredible. I love you so very much.