Please, don't grow up too fast

Dear Emily -

Tomorrow marks 12 weeks since you came in to this world and blessed so many of us. You are amazing Emily. Your smile, which you freely give to so many people, leaves them smiling too.

You've just begun to squeal, and on occasion will let out a giggle. You bring laughter to this family every day. You are so beautiful and perfect, so absolutely amazing. My heart melts each time I look at you, your eyes sparkle with this beauty that words can't match. Although you usually spend the first part of your night sleeping in your papasan bouncy seat, I look forward to you asking to be brought in to bed. I love having you close. I love waking up with you in my arms, having you sleep against me, and every possible moment I can spend with you.

One of my favorite joys is sharing all I can with your dad. When he's around you, and when he talks about you, you can see all the love he has for you. All the pictures I send, he puts on a website so your grandparents can watch you too. They too, love you so much Emily.

What an amazing blessing you've been.

As each day passes, I feel like it's passing too fast. You're growing up. You're starting to push yourself up when you're on your stomach, and you're getting closer to rolling over. When I say this, it all seems like you're so young - which you are - but the days seem to be passing by so fast and with it you're growing quicker then my camera can capture.

Before you were born I had hopes you wouldn't grow up too quickly. I don't tend to give you "tummy time" like professionals say to give to build muscles.... I feel that you have many months and years to do that. I don't put you down and leave you to cry, as some say I should with thought that you should learn to comfort yourself.... I feel you have many years to learn that. I instead hold you often, am right there when you need comfort, tell you how wonderful you are, and follow with kisses. You rarely ever cry (with exception to the carseat). My hope, is to never look back and wish I had done something different.

You're almost three-months old. Wow. You were born ahead of your age, but sweet Emily, please don't grow up too fast :)

I love you, so very very much :)

The gift of life

Dear Emily ~

Yesterday a friend asked me about your dad.... I felt like I had so much I wanted to share with her, but I just couldn't put all I felt in to the right words to convey to her the extent of how much I appreciate him and the most wonderful person he is. I find myself often talking about him to you. Today you reached for the bracelet I wear and as I put it around your ankle I talked about how your dad brought it back from China for me, and how beautiful it was. I whisper to you how much your dad loves you, and what a great man he is.

He gave you, your sisters and brother, me... the world... the most wonderful gift. He gave you the chance to come in to our family. I can never begin to thank him enough for that. You are incredible Emily, so beautiful and perfect. We are so blessed to have you with us, and I relive that feeling every moment I look at you, touch you, and kiss you. Every time you grab my shirt, talk to me, and smile. And each time, I think of your dad and thank him.

I can't wait for him to see how big you've gotten - you've grown so much since he last saw you. He's traveling right now with your aunt and cousin, but although very tired he took the time last Tuesday to find a place to get online so he could wish you a happy nine weeks. He said he looks forward to seeing and holding you again :)

Tired mama

Emily, 9 1/2 weeks

And a little girl who will soon enough be running on the beach. Enjoying her peacefulness in my arms for now :)

Definitely tired looking, and hot....

Bubbles!!

A nickname Aunt Kate gave Emily yesterday - and oh so fitting too.

Bubbles

Emily is the queen of blowing bubbles, she really can get them going too! Quite tempting to pop them as they emerge :P If she blows bubbles now and most likely doesn't realize it, how is she going to be when she DOES realize her ability to blow bubbles??

Although this nickname will most likely now stick with her for the next number of years :)

~*~ Bubbles ~*~

Another day of smiles, giggles, and the river beach

I feel very blessed to have two girls that love Emily more then anything. Whenever possible she asks to hold Emily and spend some time with her. This occasionally is difficult for me since when I hand Emily over Emily begins to cry.... the whole "I need to be with mommy" stage that she's in right now. But then there's other times where she LOVES the interaction with Alyssa. I am thankful - so thankful. Emily has two of the best big sisters she could ever hope for, and two big sisters who love her tremendously :)

Emily smiles more then any baby I've ever met. When she was inside, at the 4D ultrasound she was grinning - the one that stands out to me most was when she grinned as I laughed. She does the same thing now. She continued to grin the day she was born, and since. She grins when she firsts wakes up and sees you, and any other time she catches your attention. She is such a happy baby! I hope that all I give her emotionally, she'll continue to feel happy, safe, and content.

We visited the beach again yesterday. The other three kids love to play in the water, and Emily really loves to do anything that's outside. Although she's put her feet in the sand before and enjoyed it, she really showed enjoyment yesterday as she pushed her feet around in the sand and watched them. She must be just starting to hit the stage of realizing she has feet - although, I've always touched them, played with her toes, kissed them...... she's started to grab by face with her feet. It is SO precious!

Horse Lover?

Today Emily and I, with Kate, went to visit a local horse show. It was a small one, full of pleasure classes, what certainly would be a great starter show for any green horse or rider. Seeing one of the classes happening, I felt such longing. I miss the show world, same feeling I felt visiting the Evergreen Classics yesterday. My hope is to be ready to show next year.

With Emily in arms, we went to see the CGS horse that Jennifer loves, Alexa. She is quite the beautiful morgan, no wonder Jen feels the way she does for her! I went over to Emily could touch her - it left me smiling seeing Emily's reaction. Her eyes got big and she leaned forward towards the horse, as she did when she visited the horse that Kate rode a few days ago.

Emily hasn't had too much interaction yet with our four horses, she has seen them twice.... once a few days after she was born (Pheobe loved her) and a few weeks later.

I wonder, will she love horses too? Will she be another one that wants to ride? If so, what type of riding will she want to do? Will she want to show? And most importantly, although I can train her (if she'll listen to me as a teacher), can I give her all she needs to succeed in the area she'd like to compete in? I sure hope so.

Jonah at 3yo showing Sierra. The season he won reserve pony hi-point. This picture was taken 10 years ago. Sierra is still with us, now considered Katie's who is almost 6yo. She'll be ready for Emily to ride in a few years if she would like, and introduce her to the show ring.

This is my girl, Aaleyah, who I plan to be showing next year. This picture was taken "three childrens" ago - lots of work to do to get my riding figure back. I miss riding so much, miss showing, and really miss riding Aaleyah. She is such an incredible horse that tries to hard to learn and please. We should have a lot of fun next year :D

Last year on a rescue horse from a local rescue group. I always use to say that it would be a miserable life to be born in to my family if you didn't like animals... especially horses. Can a 9wk old infant really show such enjoyment at just the sight of a horse, already? It seemed like it today. It'll be interesting to watch her as this next year passes. I've been terrible at making the time so my own children can ride, I really need to work more on that. We have the horses. Katie's been asking to ride, begging to ride, I need to make the time so she can. What a wonderful mother/daughter time too :) With Katie, it's been neat to see her asking to do things that she preferred not to do too much of last year. Riding is one, although she enjoyed it in little bits, but swimming is another.

I wonder if Emily will like swimming? The two older kids are like fishes, and Katie has begun to enjoy water this year too :)

Beats of Love

Dear Emily -

Every day you leave me catching my breath with the overwhelming amount of love I feel for you, that I can't even come close to putting in to words. You are incredible and amazing, and more then I ever dreamed of. Each night as I fall asleep I look forward to the morning time when I watch you open your eyes, look at me, and grin this adorable toothless grin. And each morning as I am blessed to experience such a powerful sweetness, I think of your dad and when he'll be able to experience the same, as he watches you wake up in the morning.

You still don't care for your carseat too much, or riding in the car - it's one of the few times that you cry, and it breaks my heart. I reach back and stroke your hair, touch the side of your face and ears, and hope that it brings you some sort of comfort... to know that you haven't been left. It does seem to help. I have started to learn that if I nurse you before putting you in your carseat it really does help.

I have started leaving your carseat in the car most of the time, choosing to unbuckle you and carry you in to where we're going. I love the feeling of bringing you out of the carseat and on to my shoulder, kissing your head and telling you how amazing and wonderful you are - beautiful and incredible. And you so really are. You tend to grab my shirt and pull yourself closer, leaves my heart skipping with love all that much more :)