Ultrasound Day

Dear Baby -

What a day yesterday was. I was able to see the most beautiful child up on a screen - you. A child with the most adorable lips and cheeks. A child who would smile (the second smile, I laughed - you grinned!), and a child who was just as relaxed all snuggled up in there as you feel to be from the outside. You are beautiful, and so deeply loved.

I still wonder if you're a boy or a girl. I look at your photos and wonder if you're a girl now, you are so beautiful. I close my eyes and feel you inside, and wonder if you're a boy. You are so quiet and gentle - all of my other children have not come close to your gentle spirit... and with having only carried one son (my first), I wonder if you're a boy?

I've been asked what I hope for. With all the dreaming, all I hope for to hold in my arms - is you. Whether you're a boy or a girl. It would be sweet to have another son, but yet maybe Jonah is suppose to be my only one? It would be so precious to have a little girl, they're the princesses of the earth. You have two big sisters that would be excited :D I watched your dad yesterday and imagined him having a son or a daughter - my heart melts with the thoughts of you in his arms, and as you get older. He will be an amazing father to you, regardless. I did leave the ultrasound asking Jen if she was still saving baby girl clothes for me in case you're a daughter... she is.

I didn't think I could fall in love with you any more, but seeing your little face up on the screen yesterday... I did. I woke up this morning with my heart flip-flopping thinking about your picture, and you snuggled inside of me. I am in love. You mean the world to me, and I am so thankful to hold you so close already - and soon in my arms.

Jennifer took the picture down below. The series was pretty cute - As soon as your brother and sisters saw that I was taking a photo, they all started back out of the van also so they too could be in the picture. This was the last photo that Jen took. There you are in my tummy, 32w6d. My three wonderful children, and a man who I hope knows my heart will always love him. A wonderful and gentle man, so thoughtful and compassionate - a man who obviously loves you deeply already - your father. You are a very lucky child.

We all can't wait for you :)