For Grandma

... past entry...

Dear Emily -

This week has been full of so many good things, and a few difficult things.

The difficult moments....

You must have teeth nearing the surface of your gums, because you've been clamping down very tightly on my nipple when nursing ... and pulling backwards.... deeply challenging me in how long I can hold my composure while trying to reclaim my nipple from between the gums of a child who has a vice grip on them. My dear sweet child, this hurts... please stop. I can see why some mothers wean early, it certainly has left me debating this thought for during the day time. I am so very thankful that you do NOT have teeth yet. Hopefully we can pass this experience and you can go back to treating these nipples with gentleness. This would also be appreciated for the needle pinching and ripping that you do with your precious fingers.

Oh, but how much I love you :)

You have been loving food, every moment you can sweet talk some being given to you. With this though, you've experienced a bit of constipation. Your daddy suggested nursing first, and then food. Just for the reason of being sure you're receiving enough liquid alone for hydration, this is important. As I've done this your stools have relaxed, but I suspect there might be something in your diet that could encourage this also. Could it be the dairy? You love yogurt. I have started giving you a sippy with hemp milk when riding in the car. You enjoy your sippy, and I appreciate knowing you're getting extra liquid.

The good things.... oh there are so many....

You must be getting close to a tooth sprouting! You're very first! You knaw on my knuckle, and knaw on our sippy spout. You haven't gotten upset about a tooth yet, which I'm thankful for. It's hard for us parents to see our baby in discomfort and not be able to take it away.

Toys found in the most simplest things

Emily has great toys, she loves each one of them. It's quite cute though when she finds something so simple and it becomes a cool toy!

This toy opens and closes, and cool ridges on it, makes a cool crinkling sound, is see through, and feels funny when it's touched and licked!

My life with such a sweet angel

Thanksgiving day, out for a walk

Dear Emily~

Life with you is nothing less then a miracle every single day. Granted, each child in the world brings a miracle with them at every moment, but you - you are Emily! And you, you are a blessing to this world, to your brother and sisters, to your grandparents, to your dad, and to me and my heart who has held you close every moment I can. You are incredible and beautiful, and amaze me every single day.

Visiting a local dairy

You love food, oh how you love food! You see a spoon and your eyes about dart out of your head, and you're ready to try anything that's offered. The only thing I've found so far that you want nothing to do with is plain.old.rice cereal. The only thing that has ever caused you're hand to fly and smack the spoon as you whip your head the other direction. So, we mix it in with other foods.

At a local Thai restaurant where the owner adores you!

Changing your diaper has become quite the fun feat. Just as the diaper is undone, you want to reach for whatever is... over there! Or there.. or over that way! Twisting your cute little body ~ as adorable as it is, it makes it very difficult to line the diaper up and revelcro it again. But we make do :)

Beautiful girl, with outfit and silk blanket from Aunt from China

You are patient and rarely cry still... that is unless I'm not in eyeshot and you want me NOW! Your poor dad, he is such a good sport. He rolls with it all and knows you mean the best with your screaming for mommy. You're getting so much better though! I am proud of you. I do look forward to when you dance off to his car and wave bye~bye to me. I feel in my mommy gut that you are going to soon love every moment you can spend with him :)

Such Preciousness

Dear Emily -

I've tried to start this entry to you a few different times and end up deleting what I type. I can't seem to express in words what I want to share with you.... the feeling I felt tonight just watching you sleep in my arms. You are so incredible, so amazing. Every day feels like a miracle, the gratefulness I feel to be able to have you in my arms.... to be able to touch your little fingers, run my fingers over your strands of hair, kiss your ears, watch you smile and roll around. You are a miracle, a little blessing.

Today your dad came to see you. There's so many things about him that I hope as the years pass you're able to learn from. He understands the value of wholesome foods, as well as the wisdom in financial savings. He researches and speaks with knowledge. He is compassionate and kind, even towards those who don't believe the same direction he does. He is a good friend towards others, and I have no doubt that he will be a good father for you to lean on for guidance and love as you grow.

He was talking today about the strength the women in his family hold, and mentioned you may be like them too :)

You are starting to look outside the small bubble around you and I, and notice others without crying. You're observing without clinging to me at the same time. It was neat to watch you with your dad today, although I do look forward to when you reach the stage to where you can play on his lap and with him and feel secure. The time is coming. You've only recently started playing with your siblings for longer periods of time so I can take a shower or start a load of dishes.

Right now you're asleep behind me - you've grown so much and seem to be going through a growth spurt right now. The purple pajamas you're wearing say 12mo... you're not THAT big, but it does fit comfortably on you.

I'm watching you breathing, and your fingers twitching occasionally. I am so thankful for you Emily, you are such a blessing to your entire family.

Movie: "Miracle Run" and how Emily came to be

I'm watching "Miracle Run" right now, a story about a mother who stands behind her two autistic twins to help them become all they can be in life. I'm half way through the movie so far and already I've ended up with a few moments of teary eyes.

I spent three years looking for just the right person to be Emily's dad. The first couple years weren't so bad, since I was trying to understand the direction I was suppose to go to bring this child in to our home. I wondered how she would make it here. Would it be through a donor? I searched and advertised, answered ads, and put together what was most important to me in a donor while in the mean time going on to have Cassidy and Loraine, my surrogate daughters. I wondered if she would make it here through foster to adopt, so I went through the process of foster classes to become licensed.... only to be told in the end that since I had an extra child (friends son) living with me I wasn't able to foster as a single parent... I was limited to four children as a single parent, and this extra child was already four. Ok, so she wouldn't make it here that way but I sure learned a lot.

Chase though - that's what this is about. What an incredible young man, and how our family misses him. He has autism, ODD, ADHD, OCD, Depression, and a handful of other diagnosis. He went home, and didn't work out there... even though he was welcomed back to our home, he went to the other side of the US to live with his dad. I worry about him every day, but that's another story.

Fostering has always been something I've wanted to do, and thought the time had finally come - but I guess not. Chase did something for me though. Although I've always enjoyed working with children that some consider "different" or "difficult to work with/reach through to", Chase put me in the position of first hand experience of day to day living. He was amazing, brilliant, and incredible - his IQ climbed 12 points, he improved five grade levels (from 3rd to his current 8th grade), and accomplished so many other things in the six and a half months he was with me. It wasn't easy, life was exhausting - he was like having five kids in one. My son, Jonah, said I had aged quite a number of years in my face.

When he went back home I took a while to regroup myself emotionally, and continued to search for where this child was suppose to come from. I resumed looking for a donor, and as I felt Emiliy so close - I found myself in tears, so deeply wanting her in my arms. Why was it so hard to find this person? I had helped three children make it here to their parents as a surrogate, why was it so difficult to find someone, the right person, to help this child make it here to us? I had even asked a few special friends, but each said no and for reasons that were understandable - - I still cried when alone. I knew it wasn't fair to think that way, but I ached for this child - so deeply wanting her. Maybe that's what has brought her to being even that much more special to me.

And then I met Shawn. Every day I see him in Emily, and her personality, think of him and thank him. She grabs my neck and hugs me, or gives me an open mouth kiss to check (new), laughs, does something remarkable and makes all these new progresses each day... and think of him. She's here because of him.... and she has an absolutely amazing father, because of him.

I am beyond grateful for this child, this little girl who for three years I searched for how she was suppose to make it here - listened and felt for what my path to finally holding her was suppose to be. I am so thankful for her, every day and moment. I can't express my love enough - nor how deep my appreciation is to her dad.

And yet I still wonder.... I think at some point in my life I will still be a foster parent, to a hard to place child. I would like to welcome an autistic child in to my home again, but one I hope so much wont be in the position to be taken back before we cross the hilltop in goals. I can feel that time will be there.... but not yet.... and not any time soon. Maybe once my children are all grown and I can focus everything to this child. If that is the case, and this child is in spirit right now, it brings me to a question I continue to wonder....

Why? Here I hold in my family four incredible children - two with special needs - they are perfect for my family and I am thankful that I can help successfully guide them, but why would a special needs child choose a home and a body where they can't succeed in? My heart breaks for them, and I think back to Chase - but maybe part of his purpose in this life was to bless our family in the way he did, show me how good I really was at working with an autistic child, and what one day I can give to a child. Thank you Chase.

This movie is now 3/4 done....

... and there go the teary eyes again. These children hold such internal beauty and uniqueness, I wish the world would be able to see more who these children truly are and all the incredibleness they can bring to this world.

The power of the spoon for the princess of cuteness

Katie, 6, eats the way I wish I would eat. She's choosier with food and stops when she's full. Alyssa, 11, eats the way I tend to eat - inhale and loving buffets. She often will try any new foods at least once also. I remember being little and always wanting sugar (what kid doesn't?) - Alyssa has very much been like this also. Katie keeps it pretty well in check.

Emily already shows the signs of loving anything. I wonder what foods it will be that she doesn't care for? Katie doesn't usually like sauce on things, I wonder if Emily will. All the kids love vegetables and salads, will Emily? I wonder.... but what my hope is above all others is that she can be guided to make wise food choices and take the guiding when she has to choose foods on her own. I've read about how foods are introduced to her now, can effect her direction in food choices in the future. I hope to do as good of a job as I can.

Emily loves her exersaucer, but the humor comes at the end.....

How could I choose just one???? Emily and her tongue, LOL

Here it comes - she spotted the spoon that I was going to use to wave above the camara to get her attention....

Waving - "Look here Emily!"

OHHH!!! YUM!!! I WANT A BITE!!! MMmmm!!

"Oh please, please please **suck suck** Pleeeeease can I have a bite????"

More Firsts

There have been so many special events with Emily's growth happening, it's been so incredible. Every day is like a new adventure, filled with new experiences as I watch this amazing little girl experience a new day. Just as wonderful has been how much I want to share these events with her dad, so out comes the phone and a text of the new exciting event :)

Emily is now eating solid baby foods - I haven't so much been following the recommended time frames for food introductions, but rather have been listening to my intuition as to what she's ready for and how much. She loves food, which is cute, but no doubt will become a little frustrating as she gets older so soon the time will come where I'll have to work on matters. She does well, but leaning over to lick my cup of tea as I'm trying to drink it, or grab the same cup I'm trying in a grocery store, isn't necessarily considered polite. The time will come to guide her in how to say please and ask for a taste of something... without her tongue wrapping around it to indicate she wants a taste too, lol.

Emily sat up for the first time yesterday! I was getting ready to go and had her sitting on a friends couch next to me, and there she was, holding herself up with her hands and grinning all proud like. I just watched her, smiled, and talked all proud like to her - she babbles back as if she knew exactly how cool this new development was. Oh Emily, you are just so darn cute!!

An event happened yesterday that left me just as equally proud, if not more so. I am working to raise my milk supply for the two other babies I pump for and needed to stop at the local health food store to pick up Fenugreek and Marshmallow Root. I needed Blessed Thistle too but couldn't find it in any of the brands. I sent Jonah to grab someone to help, and the lady that came around the corner seemed exasperated as she answered that it would be right where I was if they had it - and tried to search for it too. We found it in another products but I needed it on it's own (to raise milk production it compliments fenugreek).

She took a moment to say hello to Emily, and as she did the tension lightened. Emily smiled at her and she smiled back, "Quite an active tongue you have there!" she said to Emily. Emily laughed, and she laughed too. She put out her hand and Emily put her hand on top of hers - she covered it and showed it to her, covered it back up again (if a baby can't see something it's nonexistant) - and Emily looked down at her hand and grinned and pulled it out and put it back on top of her hand again. I was impressed as I watched this interaction, but what happened next amazed me the most.....

The lady put her hands together, closed her middle fingers down, turned her hands and wiggled her middle fingers. Emily was bewildered and watched her do this a few different times and then looked at her own hands and gripped her hands together to make one big fist. She repeated this a few different times. Emily clearly knew what she was trying to do, and she also knew that what this lady was doing wasn't something typically done with hands - and she was going to try it! :)

This picture was taken today - Alyssa wanted to try on Emily's swimming suit that she found hanging in the closet. It was a quick candid picture, "Smile Girls!" *hearts*

And for the wondering minds... Emily has yet to have her first tooth pop through, but it's coming! She has quite the bump under her gums (her bottom left), a tooth workings it's way towards the surface to sparkle for all to see :)

The cookie monster is coming....

**Unfortunately I think blogger is changing formats again, spaces between paragraphs aren't registering. My apologies**

Dear Emily -

You've turned in to the cookie monster when it comes to food. Just a couple days ago your dad and I were talking about starting you on food - I welcomed him to choose your first real food/meal and enjoy the pleasures of feeding it to you. Maybe I have an alterior motive with that offer... the ability to take lots of great "baby food everywhere" pictures, and you thoroughly enjoying it without a mother working to keep you all clean. You SHOULD enjoy it! :D

I wonder what he'll choose, he found a wonderful website to refer to!

http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com/ There looks to be some pretty wonderful information including suggestions and recipes!

You started off with tasting a cucumber with Aunt Sam was here, and then tasting a sweet potato I was eating roughly a week ago. A few days ago you tasted oatmeal, your eyes just loving it! Yesterday you were making googly eyes at Jen (who you normally cry around) and grunting, begging for a bit of what she was eating. And she complied, and gave you a taste of her eggs.

Jonah was just holding you and you attacked his cup, taking a sip of his soy milk - - you were actually drinking from a cup. My dear, that's not typical for a not.even.5mo.child. I went to give Jonah a bit of bread I was eating and your eyes about popped out as this bread went in front of you to his mouth, LOL I did take off a teeny piece for you.

You have such a desire to start eating food, and I'm holding off. I had hopes that you'd wait until 6mo. You still may, but at this rate I doubt it. You act like you're going to engulf the spoon and the bowl - you left your brother laughing as he was watching you :)

I can only refer to you as Cookie Monster.... wonder if you'll be like the hampster below.... always remember to take small bites and chew your food completely, it's polite.... Just don't act like mommy who has to engulf her own food on the run :P

Sisters

Dear Emily -



You're going through your first real cold right now, and aren't too delighted with it. A few days ago, you'd rub your snotty nose back and forth across my shoulder and rubbed your eyes. You seemed miserable. And then I caught it - on came the sore throat and some pretty itchy eyes and nose. Yuck. You still have the snotty nose, but I think you're reaching the tail end of your cold....and I'm right behind you. There seems to be some pretty good bugs going around, here's to hoping this is the only one for us this year :)



Tonight you gave your brother a big kiss, it was so precious. You were in my arms, and he leaned close and said, "Hi Bubbles!" You reached out, took his face and pulled him close to you while you leaned close to him, and planted an open mouth kiss on his cheek.... leaving a puddle and a string of drool as you came back. Your brothers heart melted, as he wiped away a finger layer of drool. He loves you so very much :)



There is a new mom we're pumping for - while you nurse on one side I'm pumping on the other. You still do such a wonderful job of helping to keep my supply going strong, and helping to raise it now! I give a lot of credit to you - maybe one day you'll be able to meet these children who you have shared your milk with.



This is R, a precious six week old adopted girl. Isn't she beautiful? It's her little tummy and body that your milk is helping to nourish also, just like you.

I love you my sweet little one *kisses*

Yo ~ Yo ~ Baby

Dear Emily -

Last night we headed to the store to pick up some groceries. Alyssa found humor in putting her sunglasses on you and starting to beat to the rap. It was quite funny :)

Sweetness

Dear Emily,

It's been quite a while since I've written to you here. It amazes me how quickly time seems to be passing by. Each day you seem to be getting bigger, and changing in leaps. You amaze me, always. Every day I feel such gratefulness that you're a part of our family, that we all welcomed for you to find your way here. You are definitely loved, so very very much.

You have this extra sweetness about you - although your grasp is the strongest I've ever felt in a baby, your touch is the softest. Often when you nurse we'll be playing with eachothers fingers - light touches. Your skin is like silk. You are like the heavens and angels, mixed with a bit of spring warming sun.

Your eyes have started to turn brown. I watch you smile, look in to your eyes, and often wonder what you'll look like next year, or when you're two... three... five.... will you still hold this same precious spirit?

I think often about your baby brother or sister, a little one we decided to have in the future. Will s/he look like you? My heart continues to fall more and more in love with this child to be, there must be something very special about him or her.

You still seem to near stop breathing at night, but haven't stopped completely again - yet - since coming home from the hospital where nothing was seen. All was great for a good stretch, and then there it was again... but just extreme shallow breathing.... jiggled you a bit and you took a big breath. At least my mommy nerves aren't going haywire. You did this again last night. I do look forward to when you grow out of this. Your dad bought you this neat monitor that measures your breathing and sounds an alarm if you ever stop again.

Your dad is coming to see you again tomorrow. He is quite the cool dad ~ You seem to have an extra special dearness for him already... I do look forward to seeing if you end up being that "daddy's girl" as I suspect you may just be. He's gentle, wise, and smart... he is a great dad and loves you very much :)

Blessings

My little 3mo blessing, Emily

The gift of life.

There are a handful of different ways this gift can be given, but I have been so dearly blessed to help give this gift in the form of a child - a dream come true - for a very special friend. An experience that I remember every day, a birth that is etched in to my memory. I remember so many tears of deep ache, as she longed for a child she doubted would ever be.

Cassidy Anne was born a little over three years ago, delivered by her moms hands while the midwife watched over. A little blessed, a little dream. For Cassidy to be able to make it here, not only did I give a part of myself (egg) but also gave Cassidy a home to grow in for nine months. As if it was yesterday, I remember that positive test and being able to tell her mom that her baby was on her way. When she found out that her baby was a little girl. When she gave Cassidy her first bottle and Cassidy fell back asleep with a happy and full tummy. The moments that her mom entrusted me with, as I spent alone time with Cassidy the day after she was born, last nursing before she went home, and my first visit (her first Christmas) where I slept in her room and wrapped all my love around this most dearest and loved child.

So much of what I learned I've been able to pass on to Emily's dad. Remembering how special that time alone was after Cassidy was born, I left Emily sleeping with her dad the day after she was born while I went in to town to get my son. Time, how precious time meant to me... how I wanted to pass that on. I experienced how much pictures meant to me, and with that memory passed many pictures over to her dad as I could. I loved hearing experiences Cassidy was having, funny moments, the laughter and challenges her mom was going through... and so I passed just the same on to Emily's dad too, and share with him all I can.

I thank him every moment I look at Emily. Every moment I feel an overwhelming amount of love as I look at her sleeping, as her hand grasps my finger, as her eyes look in to mine, and as she smiles and laughs. I thank him. He has blessed our family with the most amazing gift I could ever imagine, a part of himself so Emily could make it here. I feel so honored, so thankful. Each time I hug her in my arms and her hand against my cheek, my heart hugs him and thanks him for the entire world he's handed to us..... and to himself, his parents, his family, and his friends.

Emily, you are so loved. So very loved by so many.

Cassidy, with her mom

Cassidy, with my daughter Katie (her sister)

Cassidy, walking Katie to her first day of Kindergarten

First sleep through the night

It's the moments of new steps that seem to stand out the most as these little tiny being grow. Those first smiles, first tooth, first foods..... last night Emily had another first, her first time sleeping through the night. The entire night.

Emily fell asleep as normal, and I placed her in her papasan bouncer - her first falling asleep place before she's brought in to bed with me. I ended up quite late talking her her dad online about dreams, the roll a fathers love can play for a child, benefits of nursing, tredmills, and other subjects. I enjoy our talks, their always educational. I finally climbed in to bed at 4am, Emily hadn't woken up yet. I thought for sure that she would soon, but when I woke for good at 7:30am, she was still sleeping. I had enough time to stretch and pump before she finally woke up.

Her first time.

I give credit to this lovely thumb of hers that she finally found. So far she uses it wonderfully - usually to sooth herself back to sleep when she's half awake. That must have been what she did last night.

I watch her in wonder. Something that seems so little to some, but so preciously big to me. I am proud, so very proud.

09-12-2010

Dear Emily ~

Today was an amazing day with your dad. We went and watched Avatar in 3D - it was amazing. Your brother was so excited when your dad called and gave the invite, he was squealing :) The 2D one is brilliantly made, 3D made it even more incredible. I wonder if when you're old enough to read these entries, if they will have made sequels or if it will be just as desired of a movie as it is now.

You really enjoy your time with your dad - there is a sense of knowing who he is, but seem to still prefer to remain in my arms. He is wonderful and rolls with what is comfortable for you, never leaving you feeling uncomfortable and without ever showing disappointment. I wonder if he realizes how wonderful this has been for you and your emotional security. As he does this, your security in yourself when you're not with me grows and your own confidence in yourself grows too.

Today I nursed you, and handed you to your dad after you were asleep. I sat there.... watching you and him together. One moment in particular, you woke fussing after I handed you to him and he adjusted you so you were comfortable and you fell back asleep. Your faces were close together, and I looked at you. At him. At both of you together. The shapes of your noses, ears, colors of your skins... noticing all the similarities that the two of you shared.... and the love that so clearly radiated from him. Behind my dark glasses I hid the overwhelming emotion of love that came in quiet tears.... I am so thankful for how much he loves you, and how much he wants to be with you. Watching the two of you, I felt what I have felt many times before... a wave of deep love and appreciation for the man who helped to give you life - a part of himself so you could make it here. A man who so openly loves you, and is so proud of you.

You spent a good part of the afternoon in his arms. I loved watching the two of you together, and the peace you felt especially when you snuggled in to his shoulder.

After we dropped your dad off at home and were pulling away, your brother commented on how how sees how much love your dad feels for you in his eyes. It's heart warming to watch, and very humbling to be in the middle of.

My Children

The characters that never fail to bring humor to my life every day. Of course, with the humor is also the frustrations that come with raising these munchkins, the separating of fighting siblings, the questioning of a request I've given, and yet also the complete joys of watching them becoming their own individuals - and strong independent ones that that.

Last night at 10pm we all ran to the store. My son wanted to give a round 2 on making ginger ale, changing the recipe up a bit. So much humor came with walking through the store, with both girls rattling off the "I got my eyeeee on yoooou" quote from, "Cloudy, with a chance of meatballs". They had me laughing, quite a bit. We must have been quite a sight. Not to mention, at checkout my son successfully managed to talk me in to an extra tub of ice cream.... with the bribery of cleaning my bathroom and also all the windows in the house. Fine :P Who bribed who in that one? LOL

Motherhood

Motherhood has to be one of the most intense and exhausting jobs a mother will ever face. There's the sleepless nights with a newborn, where they think it's time to play... if they're not screaming, sick, throwing up, or any other things that leave moms wondering if they're not doing something right. We walk around with bags under our eyes, praying for a moment to take a nap, while keeping up with any other children we may have, as well as housework, meals to be made, and expectations of our spouces, friends, schools, etc.

I feel lucky, Emily sleeps. She doesn't scream (except the few temper tantrums that she's thrown, when she gets ticked, which are actually quite cute). She hasn't been sick yet, and hasn't thrown up. She's easy. One of the easiest babies I've ever met. She's full of so many smiles, she rarely ever cries (with the exception of her carseat). She is incredible.

I have never in my motherhood years, received the gift of the words that I've received from Emily's dad. The thanks for what has been given up to be a mom - the thanks for all the time it takes - and the appreciation for it all, plus Emily.

What incredible words to hear. With all it takes to be a mom, amazing how something so simple can mean so much. How it can be so relieving and empowering. I feel as if I've breathed in a armful of energy - and rather then feeling the missing of certain things in my life, I feel as though I've been given renewed energy for what means the most to me in this world, as I step in to the next day of motherhood.

I love being a mom, so very very much. I love each of my children, and love all I'm able to give them. It really is the most important thing on this earth, being a mom - the raising of our children - since it's these children that are the next generation. I hope that I'm able to guide the ones under my care to the very best of my ability.

And my next big challenge is being handed to me..... being a mom to teenagers (my 14yo son and 11yo daughter). I think I'm well enjoying Emily's infancy right now :)

First camping trip

I love the ocean, besides horses it's got to be one of my most favorite places to visit. Well, I suppose it's tied with anything having to do with nature. The sound, the air, the feel of the energy radiating from the ocean... it's all just so amazing.

Since moving to Washington, I wasn't sure where a nice camping place next to the ocean would be and so I stalled in going. A few weeks ago a friend, Charis, suggested that we all take a trip there with a few of our families and camp. A final trip to see off the summer before school started for our children. As much as I wanted to go, I found myself hesitating the night before. All the things I could be getting done at home during the weekend, but alas I found myself loading up in to the van the next day. Well stuffed with people and items, we headed out.



I couldn't wait to get down to the beach, to feel the water - to hear and see the waves. To cross from the path from the campground, to the path to the beach, you had to take a ferry across a fresh water stream. All the kids loved it, including the dogs! There was a bridge a little ways off we could have taken, but why, when the kids got such enjoyment watching us adults trying to balance and not get wet in this little ferry boat?



The sand was quite soft, softer then I've ever experienced walking on before. It was quite the workout, but enjoyable too... when shoes were off. To sink and feel this sand under your feet. Where the tide came up, the sand was squishy also! While trying to drawn a heart for Emily, my foot sank down in to the sand.





For the first part, Emily slept. I stood there with my eyes closed, listening to the ocean, feeling this cherished dream baby against me - kissing her head - and felt such thanks.



We ended up back up at the campsite after a while, and Emily fell asleep. The sun was setting, and I felt the draw to be on the beach when it set. Unfortunately, although we hustled (yes, I ran with sleeping baby in arms), some teens were at the ferry goofing around. We were able to get across eventually, but just barely missed the sunset. That's ok though, it was lovely to just be there :)

After the sun went down, we worked our way back to camp. Emily, was still asleep - she seems to sleep through anything! She eventually woke up and joined in with us on a game of charades - not like she could take a turn, but she was imitated by one of the players :D


She slept incredibly well for camping, and a new environment! She woke up once at 5:30am, to be hooked up to nurse, and then fell back asleep. Her final wakeup for the day was at 9:30am. What an excellent sleeper. She definitely earned the right to go camping again, soon!

After breakfast, and following our campsite being loaded back up in to the van, we headed back down to the beach. What heaven. We all agreed that we should have planned for two nights and three days. Next year :)

Jen tried to make hearts for all four of my children, but the tide came in too quickly....

Emily's patience finally wore out. She took the travel time to the beach well, camping, time on the beach, running mama trying to catch the sunset, the fire side games, and the scary bathroom stalls like a trooper.... but the ride home wasn't something she was too thrilled about in the least bit. Jennifer found Daisy, a little giraffe, in my diaper bag and hug it up for her. Emily found enjoyment it it. Poor thing though, Jen tried wiping her tears away but one remained when this picture was taken :(